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Getting a Divorce – After the trial – now what?

Part Five – Getting a Divorce – After the trial – now what?

As stated in part one of this series: divorce is never easy and divorce is not fun. It is a legal proceeding made more difficult by a broad range of emotions. We always recommend a divorce lawyer to help you get the best result.

In Part One we listed 10 suggested things to do before your divorce.

In Part Two we listed things NOT to do prior to your divorce.

In Part Three and Part Four, we listed things to do and not-to-do during the divorce trial.

In the final article, our goal is to review what to do and not to do after the trial is over. Now that the trial is all over, the court has handed down the ruling, and/or accepted any arbitration or settlement, it is time to move on. These suggestions will help you cope with the aftermath and make the best of the situation you find yourself in.

This is what you should try to do:

#1. If you did not get custody of your children, then do get specific visitation. Fulfill your visitation rights and see your children regularly. They will need you.

#2. Regardless of how your former spouse handles the divorce order, be sure to obey all orders as set by the courts and agreements.

#3. Do your best to avoid your former spouse. There is no going back, and it is probably best at this point to allow time to do its work.

These items you should try not to do!

#1. Do not beat yourself up over any perceived mistakes or actions taken that brought you to this point. You have enough to deal with emotionally without trying to relive it all over again. Forgive yourself and move on.

#2. Do not closet yourself away from everyone and everything. Go ahead and make yourself get out of the house and socialize. Learn how to rebuild your life.

#3. Do not involve your children in the details of your divorce. As in all stages of the legal proceedings, this was between you and your spouse and the children need to be keep as far away as possible from the details. Do not be overly protective of them either. Just attempt to make the best of every situation with them that you can.

#4. And lastly, do not attempt to confront anyone who might have been involved in the divorce, including friends who might have testified against you, or in-laws, or anyone else. It is over and nothing you can say or do will change that. In fact you might just make it worse. Get on with it!
We hope this series has been helpful. Please call or contact us if you need help!

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